Ain't no tongue can tell

I happened to walk past the US embassy today. Turns out it's on the same street as my hotel. It's not as ominous-looking as Guantanamo in Sarajevo, but it has armed guards and the side street that runs next to the building is blocked off and guarded. (As I write this I'm realizing that I can't remember ever seeing a US embassy outside the Balkans, so maybe they are all like that.) The creepy part though, and I caught myself saying it right out loud as I realized what was wrong with this picture, is that the building has no windows. You can see where the windows used to be, but now they're all sealed. (Is there an architectural euphamism for boarded-up?) Incidentally, there are some bombed-out buildings on the very next block, but it was NATO doing the bombing--not like anyone was attacking the embassy. I have to admit, though, that the extreme security measures don't seem quite as ridiculous to me as they probably would have two weeks ago.

In addition to the Serbia for Serbs symbol and the occasional swastika, there is a lot of Kosovo-related graffiti here; in particular, you see Kosovo 1389 scrawled on a lot of buildings. The Battle of Kosovo, which happened on June 28, 1389 (Gregorian calendar, I think), is very important to the Serbs. There the Serbs fought the Ottomans in an attempt to curb Ottoman power in Serbia. (It didn't work.) It's part of why they (some of them? most of them? I'm not sure) feel entitled to Kosovo as part of Serbia today. (Lola got all bent out of shape telling about the assassination of Franz Ferdinand: "He had the nerve to Sarajevo on June 28!") I had some of my many 'You've gotta be fucking kidding me' moments in Balkan history when reading about Kosovo. For one thing, in the centuries after the Battle of Kosovo, Serbs moved north and Albanians moved into Kosovo. It's not like someone kicked the Serbs out of their holy land; they left. Also, says Captain Obvious, that battle was over six hundred years ago. It makes the southern United Statesians with their confederate flags look timely. And, that very important 600-year old battle that people were dying for just a few years ago? The Serbs lost. The end.

...ok, not really the end. If you're into military history, I guess the battle was probably more of a draw, although the Serbs definitely went on to lose the war. Also, now I feel bad for bitching so much about Belgrade and the people who live here. I had this hilarious waiter the other night who, when he brought me the check, also brought me this red napkin torn and folded into the shape of a rose, "Just so you can tell the people 'look what that crazy waiter gave to me.'" No one has made me feel bad about not speaking Serbo-Bosnio-Croatian-Former-Yugoslav-Republic-of-Macedonian-whatever. Older couples hold hands while they walk their little dogs. And, the sun finally came out. It's complicated.

ps. I can't find the original Onion version, but I've been thinking of this all week.